


Are You Being Naughty?

by LavaKenn



Category: Impractical Jokers
Genre: Cards Against Humanity, Established Relationship, F/M, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Hand Jobs, Hanging With The Jokers, M/M, Offensive Card Game, Oral Sex, Public Sex, references to the show
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-15
Updated: 2018-08-15
Packaged: 2019-06-27 18:45:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15691221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LavaKenn/pseuds/LavaKenn
Summary: You are enjoying a Card Against Humanity game with the gang when you have some naughty thoughts, why not act on them?A lot of fluff mixed with mature pornography and little to no plot.No defined pronouns or sex are used for the Reader.





	Are You Being Naughty?

“Blank, kid tested, mother approved,” Sal read off the card in front of him.

“Oh god, the first card I have is 'Orgasm Face'!” Murr snickered from across the table.

You hadn’t been a part of the group of friends for long, but you’d joined in on their little hangout nights ever since you had started dating Brian, and tonight they decided to play a game called Cards Against Humanity. You all knew it was sort of a childish game, especially for the older men, but it was really the only thing they had laying around and really it was nice to just let loose sometimes. The boys bust out laughing, easily falling into reminiscing together and forgetting about the game, it had been a while since they had all got together and just hung out and didn't have to worry about shooting for the show or being on tour. At the mention of orgasm faces, you couldn’t stop the grin splitting across your lips and your eyes darting up to Q for a quick second.

“How would that orgasm face go exactly?” you asked Murr teasingly.

“Oh yeah, do it!” Sal urged.

Red-faced, Murr jutted out his lower lip and “ooh” ed into the air. Another round of laughter hit the table as Murr collapsed into his arms on the table giggling.

“I’m dying,” you gasped out through laughs.

Finally, you were all able to collect yourselves as you started looking for a card to play. Every one of yours sucked except one, and it made your guts cringe to even lay it down, but of course, you went with it. The game was meant to be offensive, you tried to remember.

As Joe and Murr looked through their cards, you looked back over at your boyfriend and couldn’t help the turn your thoughts took. His orgasm face was obviously nothing to laugh about, his real orgasm face was one of the sexiest faces you've ever witnessed, although it was fucking hilarious to imagine if it were anything like the one Murr had just pulled. Thinking on such a topic had your brain wandering towards the dangerous land of sex and orgasms, and you shut your thighs instinctively.

“Okay, here was go,” Q sighed, finally placing down a card.

He apparently noticed your not-so-subtle staring and his dark brown orbs met yours, eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

“You okay babe?”

“Mmhmm, sorry, lost in thought,” you admitted.

With a chaste kiss, you reluctantly returned your attention to the game where Sal was reading the cards.

“My tiny penis, kid tested… whoa god, no… mother approved.”

Your nose crinkled up in silent laughter at the expression across his face.

“A disappointing birthday party, kid tested, mother approved. Ha!”

“Michael Jackson, kid tested, mother approved.”

There it was, your card. As they started giggling and goofing around, you felt a swell of hope in your chest. Maybe you’d finally win a card! Playing this game with four exceptional comedians

“Scary clowns, kid tested, mother approved.”

“Eww, no,” you muttered with a quick shudder.

“Aw, what’s wrong? You wouldn’t want to play with a clown?” Q teased.

With a deadpan look from you, chuckled hiding his face behind his cards tauntingly.

“Asshole,” you muttered jokingly.

“I have to go with Michael Jackson. That’s too fucking perfect,” Sal decided.

“Yessss!”

Murr and Joe groaned and complained as you swipe up the card, but you just preened happily at your first win.

“Why do I hurt all over?” Joe read aloud.

You searched through your cards again and slapped down a random one, not liking any of the choices while the others silently chuckled to themselves on occasion.

Q’s little noises and movements from beside you stole your attention again, and you debated trying something sneaky as your thoughts turned lewd once more. Most likely the others wouldn’t notice… What would the harm be?

Leaning in closer, you pretended to look at his cards with him while your hand sneaks under the table.

“What do you th-aahaaa- nk?” Q gasped, shooting you a glare as your hands rubbed the inside of his thigh.

“I like that one,” you replied, pointing at the one in the middle.

He nodded but didn’t say another word. You kneaded the muscular flesh of his thigh and slowly moved up, enjoying the slight jumps and flinches it earned from his stoic face.

“Okay, Why do I hurt all over?” Joe announced, scooping up the cards.

You returned the majority of your attention on Joe but kept working your way up to the object of your desire ever so slowly.

“Revenge fucking.”

His eyebrows lifted as he gave a little chuckle, then moved on to the next one.

“Why do I hurt all over? A big black dick." He couldn't hold back a snort after reading that one.

“Why do I hurt all over? Midget wrestling.”

Even you had to let out a snicker at that, imagining Joe wrestling in that style of match.

“So, Murr?” Sal retorted, earning a sharp exclamation of disagreement from said man.

"It would be a hell of a lot easier than Byamba!" he retorted making the group laugh.

“Why do I hurt all over? Filling every orifice with butterscotch pudding…?”

The distraught look on his face was enough to crack the rest of you up. With the raucous noise filling the air, you took the chance to skip up to the growing bulge in Q’s pants.

“Mother f–”

Q caught himself carefully, a pained look coming over his face as all eyes darted in his direction.

“Kicked the table with my toe,” he lied easily.

“Ouch,” you retorted, exuding false empathy.

“Butterscotch pudding has to be the winner, might as well add in with all the rice” Joe announced.

“Yes!” Sal hissed.

“Of course,” you teased, sticking out your tongue.

He returned the sentiment as you reached out for a card off the deck.

“This Month’s Cosmo; Spice up your sex life by bringing blank into the bedroom,” you read aloud.

They all went quiet as they searched through their card. You caught Q’s side eye look before you shut your eyes, a little grin obvious on your face as his hardened under your caressing touches.

Even through the sweatpants, you enjoyed the thickness of his member filling your hand.

Murr made a noise to let you know they were ready and you grabbed up the cards off the table.

“This Month’s Cosmo; Spice up your sex life by bringing Nickleback into the bedroom." Immediately you had to slap your forehead and let out a snicker.

“This Month’s Cosmo; Spice up your sex life by bringing… used panties into the bedroom,” you groaned.

“This Month’s Cosmo; Spice up your sex life by bringing a lifetime of sadness into the bedroom, oh my god guys." You rolled your eyes at the giggling men.

“This Month’s Cosmo; Spice up your sex life by bringing Bill Clinton, naked on a bear skin rug with a saxophone into the bedroom.” By the time you finished the card, you could barely speak, laughter bubbling beneath the surface until tears prickled at your eyes.

“Fucking Bill Clinton, of course,” you said.

“Yes!” Joe explained, grabbing the card.

“Babe,” Q sighed in mock disappointment.

With a squeeze to his erection, his sass was gone, instead, cheeks and ears heating dark red as he bit into his bottom lip hard.

He read off the next card but you barely paid attention, laying down the top card from your hand without reading it, too focused on the way he was fidgeting suddenly in his chair. Luckily the other boys were distracted in their conversation about which card was better, so you sped up your strokes.

Suddenly Brian leaned close to your ear, his other hand snatching your wrist painfully hard and jerking it faster.

“I’m going to get you for this later,” he panted huskily, “I can not believe you’re doing this right in front of them.”

You turned to his other ear and whispered back in a seductive tone, “All that talk about orgasm faces made me wanna give you one.”

He barely caught his grunt from sounding out too loud, letting the sensation reverberate against your cheek as his grip on your wrist tightened to the point you were on the edge of pulling away from pain; but then you felt it. His thighs clenched hard under your forearm and his cock stiffened and pulsed in your hand.

His moan was nearly silent in your ear as he let out the quietest curse.

“You’re lucky these pants won’t show a cum stain,” he sighed sharply when he pulled back.

“If you two are done whispering sex talk over there, we’d like to continue,” Sal nearly shouted, causing you both to jump apart and your faces to flush.

Murr and Joe smirked but said nothing.

“There will be plenty of time for naughty stuff in your own room tonight. Get to reading,” He urged.

Thankfully neither of them seemed to notice more than your heated talk, and you couldn’t help but smirk to yourself.

Now to try and win this game.

**Author's Note:**

> Literally came up with this while watching an episode and playing this game with some of my friends.  
> Also thought of making this for Sal but I thought it to be more fitting for Q seeing as Sal would be rather disgusted with having to sit in his own pleasure product, though if people want me to edit it to Sal I can, just let me know!
> 
> I hope you enjoyed! Feel free to leave me some constructive criticism!
> 
> Follow my [Tumblr](https://lavakenn.tumblr.com)!


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